Alan and I woke up about 7 am Friday morning. I had been up longer than that, but I heard Mahir walking around downstairs, so I thought it would be ok to get up. I didn’t want to wonder around the house by myself! Mahir is not used to people being up so early. Shownim, Tanya and Sabriya usually sleep in a little later. I was letting Alan take the lead as to what to eat for breakfast. Mahir didn’t like this. He said I should eat what I want to eat and not what Alan tells me to eat. I would look to Alan for support. Mahir would tell me, Don’t look at him! Make up your own mind!
Oh dear. J One of my main goals coming here was to make a good impression and by no means appear to be a pushy, demanding American. I am here to have the real Iraqi experience. I want to eat whatever they would normally eat. I am very lucky because all of these foods have been amazing.
(Side Note: We are having our first power outage! Luckily, I had my computer open, so we still had light in the room. They have flashlights here that charge on the wall during times with electricity, which can be removed during times of power outages. We have them all over the house. The power went out at 10:30pm. Let’s see if I am still writing when it comes back on.)
A standard breakfast starts with traditional Kurdish bread. It has a diameter of about 2 feet and is a thin as a sheet of paper. It sits on the counter in a large stack and is dry like a cracker. When you are ready to eat it, you run water over it from the sink and place a moist towel over it to rehydrate the bread. Within a few minutes it is nice and soft. We start eating the bread by dipping it in a special yogurt made by a friend of the family that lives in the countryside. The best yogurt is made of all sheep’s milk. This is easily available in the Spring and Summer as the little lambs are born. In the winter months, it is very special to get sheep milk yogurt. Now it is mixed with goat milk because it is easier to obtain. Alan describes the yogurt as being sour. That makes it sound somewhat unpleasant. Rather, it is the best yogurt that I have ever had. I am not a fan of sweet yogurt. This yogurt is savory and a little tangy. Alan and I also shared a banana imported from Ecuador. I had two cups of strong black tea to help make up for that fact that I didn’t sleep much.
Friday’s agenda was family visits at Mahir’s family houses. It is now a compound of four houses connected by garden areas and garages. This led to my first MAJOR mistake of the trip. When you enter a house you usually need to take off your shoes. I was wearing flats with no socks. I wasn't worried. My feet were clean and my toenails were nicely painted. I was focusing on meeting everyone and making a good impression. Tanya came in with a pair of slippers saying that everyone was worried about my bare feet! Oh dear! I have created quite a stir. They made me Turkish coffee with sugar to cut down on the bitterness. It was so strong. Mom, I thought you would have enjoyed it very much. Alan told me never to refuse food when it is offered to me. Someone tells me to take more. It doesn’t matter if I am full. I take more! They passed around sweets with the coffee. It was a chewy candy filled with pistachios and covered in flour to keep them from sticking. The flour feel all over my brown pants, so I looked like a mess trying to wipe it all off. I remembered to take out my camera at the first house and got some nice pictures. One of the aunts said that she does not want her picture on the Internet, so I will not be posting that one. I will post pictures of Noraddin (Alan’s grandfather) and Rashid (Alan’s great grandfather). Their pictures were on the wall at the first house.
The aunts showed us the dolmas they were making us for lunch. They looked wonderful. I have a picture of them from when they were done and plated. The kitchen door led to the next house with more aunts and cousins. This is where cousins Kosar (who I met while he got his Master’s degree at Oklahoma State), Shayan and Tawar live with their mother and her sisters. I was allowed to leave my shoes on there, so crisis averted. I was served such a yummy apricot juice. It was thick, almost like a smoothie. Everyone was so nice. They apologized for speaking Kurdish so much and for their rusty English. I commented when I could, but mostly just smiled and acted like I knew what was going on. When my cheeks were tired, I drank my juice. Kosar was still sleeping and would not wake up when he was told we were there. We later learned that he thought his mom was joking to fool him into getting out of bed. When Kosar was at our house, it was common for him to sleep until 3, 4 or 5 pm. Tawar came home while we were there. He is about our age and very friendly. He offered to take us to the Citadel (the old castle) of Erbil tomorrow (Christmas Day).
The third house belonged to another cousin. She has four children who go to an English school. Unfortunately, they were very shy and didn’t want to practice their English with me. I did have to take off my shoes again, which causes another stir. The daughter brought me a pair of sparkly flip-flops. Note to self: WEAR SOCKS!!! The aunt did not want her picture taken, so I took pictures of the beautiful light fixtures and furniture. International House Hunters should come here. Call HGTV.
The fourth house was another house of cousins. There were more hugs and kisses. Every new house was filled of warm, welcoming people. It was so nice. The furniture in this house was so nice. I wish I had taken pictures of it. The shape of the chairs was so unique and the fabric had a rich pattern of red and gold. The tablecloth was covered in beads and sequins. I loved it! Every time I see someone wearing sparkles, I know they are my type of person. J
The aunts sent lunch home with us. Lunch is the main meal of the day, which is served around 2pm. Dinner is lighter and is served between 8 and 10pm. We had dolmas. It was similar to the ones that Alan makes, for those of you that have tried them. However, these had fewer spices and more tomato sauce. They stuffed onions, cucumbers and squash, which I am used to. However, they also stuffed Swiss chard, eggplant, tomatoes and bell peppers. We didn’t have the yogurt sauce, but the extra tomato sauce made it so moist that it wasn’t missed. The cousins included a small pot of black rice and chicken just because they know how much we love it. Yum! A picture is worth a 1000 words, so I will post a picture.
After a much needed nap, my hair was a mess. I braided it. This led to maybe my most touching moment of the trip so far. Sabriya came out of her room and saw me sitting in the main room. She walked up to me and pet my head and ran her hands down my braid. She told me that my hair was beautiful (dzoo-ana) and called me “my bride, my bride!” It is common for the daughter-in-law, or in this case grand daughter-in-law, to be called the bride long after the wedding. I felt so accepted. Yay me! I must be doing something right. We don’t even speak the same language, but she accepts me. She does tell Alan often that he should have taught me more Kurdish before coming here. She also tells me that I must learn more Kurdish. Everyone helped me write out a long list of important Kurdish words to know. I have my cheat sheet now!
The first full day went very well. Sitting in the living room with the curtains drawn, it could have been a scene from anywhere in the states. This is a normal, loving family. It is universal. There is nothing foreign about this. J Happy.
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